I really feel for Katrina "Soupy Sails" De Voort in Juno. Everyone thinks she's giving the "stink eye" when really, that's her face. That is just what she looks like.
A couple of nights ago, while out with my fiance and soon to be in-laws, we were enjoying a honkey tonk/Texas country band and I was asked 1,537 times why I was not having a good time. I was having a fantastic time! Why couldn't they tell from my natural demeanor that I was happy to step out of my "skinny jean" music bubble and enjoy some good ol' country tunes? Because, like Michael Cera's prom date, I suffer from CBF. That's right, Chronic Bitch Face.
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If one more person tells me to cheer up, smile, or enjoy myself I'm going to punch them in the mouth. Dear grinning fools, I was actually feeling just fine and freakin' dandy until you asked me for the bazillionth time what was wrong. Now I'm pissed...just like my face would have you believe. When I tell you that I'm having a good time, I'm having a mother-farking good time! Leave me the eff alone! This is just my face. Since birth I have had dimples in my forehead right above my eybrows. My lips naturally hang down so when I'm grinning my mouth is straight. If I were an emoticon I would be this guy: >:o/
Not attractive, I know. Teenage girls are fed with crap like, "Never frown because you don't know who is falling in love with your smile." Total b.s. How am I supposed to walk around with a smile ear-to-ear just hoping someone falls in love with a face that isn't natural to my state of being? Pssht. My man better love all my faces because chances are he's gonna see ol' bitch face a lot more than Miss Smiles. I don't know why I don't smile like everyone else, I just don't.
So please, if you see someone who has a straight face, don't pester them about it. It will only take them from normal to aggrivated and you will then be the reason why they are now indeed mad.
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