Lesson Learned

During these last 14 months of wedding planning, I've really learned a lot of valuable life lessons. Even though this experience has been incredibly taxing and life-changing in ways I didn't expect, I am inexplicably glad to have learned a few things about life.

1. Your groom cares more than you think. He probably puts on a tough exterior of nonchalance and tells you at every turn "Babe, this is your day. Do whatever you want and I'll show up." Don't let this fool you. He does indeed care, and if he thinks something sucks, listen to him. This day isn't about the bride, it is about the bride and groom and the moment you begin to truly share your lives together. Share the fun exciting parts with him. Let him help in some of the DIY tasks. Most importantly, if something is weighing heavily on you, TELL HIM ABOUT IT!!! Don't try to handle it all on your own only to erupt in irrational stress and ugly cries. After all, the whole reason you are doing this is to become "one" as a couple. You are entering marriage where (for hopefully a lifetime) you will experience many trials and tribulations and need each other for support. He is your support base and you are his. This is why you are getting married so let him know what is stressing you out.

2. You will discover the people in your life who really care about you. You will be shocked no doubt at who ultimately doesn't give a shit, but there is such a sweet surprise in finding out who does care and is actually excited for you. Naturally, most people are self-centered. That is our culture. I have had such a happy surprise in seeing those who are willing to stop their lives for a day or even more just because they are excited for our new venture. Do not forget to thank them. There are enough losers in our lives weighing us down, it is high time we celebrate those who love us.

3. Do not rely on anyone else for what you deem as a priority. This is a tough one to admit but hey, it's the truth and I'm all about keepin' it reeeeal. I know, I know. Didn't I just say in #1 to let the mister help you out? Of course! It is okay, and damn necessary to delegate tasks. Repeat after me, "I am not Wonder Woman."

 Those are some bitchin' wrist cuffs though.

Even though delegation is essential, do not expect everyone else to have the same set of priorities as you. What is of the utmost importance to you, is not that big of a deal to someone else. If you need it to get done and get done now, do it. Do not expect someone else to have your determination even though they may have a kind enough heart to want to help. You will find yourself being irrationally upset at your loved ones for not reading your mind and doing exactly what you wanted.

WTF 

You are undoubtedly constrained by time and the almighty dollar, but if it is that important, just find the time and the money and make it happen. Buck up buttercup, let's do this.

4. Make sure that you have a freakin' contract before you give a vendor any money! I know this is common sense to, well everyone with a brain, but we trusted someone we thought was a friend and they took our money and ran. As my fave Weddingbee blogger Mrs. Zebra would say, Snatch.  More than I am angry, and holy hell am I angry, I am so saddened by the backstabbing hurt given by someone whom I thought I was close to. Hell, this person had a hand in raising me and they did me like this? I don't think so mo-fo.

5. Speaking of Weddingbee, this wonderful online community of brides has been my saving grace. So much inspiration, commiseration, and love is spread throughout the hive.

My happy place

Granted, I am a troll among trolls. I am not a "Bee" in that I am not a pseudo-celebrity bride blogger with a kick ass moniker. I so want to apply with every stitch of my being, but with only 6 weeks until the wedding, I know the rejection letter is imminent and would break my wittle bitty bride heart. I also am not that big on the boards. I look at them occasionally and participate in random polls, but never once have I posted a damn thing about my own wedding. But reading these ladies stories has helped me through the toughest parts of wedding planning. For that I am forever grateful. I'm not sure where I would be without Mrs. Zebra's posts. Seriously, this chick is my wedding planning soul mate.

With 6 weeks to go I am sure I have a lot more to learn. I will take the lessons God has given me so far and hopefully not explode make this wedding my bee-otch! I am so thankful I am learning these lessons now and have them in my tool belt, rather than down the road when shit gets real. Thanks for learning and loving right along with me!

Damn you Pinterest!

My love affair with Pinterest is downright Shakespearean. I could wax on and on about how much joy each and every pin and like gives me. My pin boards are full of dreamy idealistic items for the future that will never happen. I sigh every time I design my future home or dress my future babies with items I will never be able to afford. There is even a practical side to the.best.website.ever. Many of my man's favorite new recipes have come from ol' Pinterest. My ladies and I even planned my bachelorette party with it's own board and the aid of Pinterest's contributor tool. We each can submit ideas to this one board that we all share. It's pretty ballin'.

Alas, one fateful day, my sweet sweet Pinterest failed me. A friend pinned a picture of an autographed bride and groom Minnie and Mickey Mouse with the instructions "OMG. If you send Mickey and Minnie an invitation to your wedding, they'll send you and autographed photo! Micky & Minnie The Walt Disney Company 500 South Buena Vista Street Burbank, California 91521"

 

Pinterest

How freakin' amazing is that?! Upon seeing this, I damn near broke my mouse (hehe oh the irony) hitting Repin and added Mickey and Minnie Mouse with their address to our guest list. These mice were getting the best damn invitation their humongous eyes had ever seen and I could not wait to receive their autographed picture. A picture that Minnie Mouse actually touched with her own over sized glove! Yes, I am five.

The time came for invitations to be sent to the mail, and then two weeks later they actually went out. RSVPs started rolling in little by little. No response from the Mouse House. Then one bright shiny lunch break, what awaited me at the mailbox? 

All photos personal

A pre-printed, mass produced, barely authentic postcard. No personalization. No photograph of the "real" Mickey and Minnie. No "real" signatures. Just a cartoon postcard that is undoubtedly stacked up in the office of someone (whom I envy greatly) at Disney World. They slap on a label with your return address and send it out with that day's outgoing mail. The most offensive part? Apparently Disney office wench Micky can't spell for shit:

Personal Photo - sorry, my point-and-shoot sucks sometimes

Just in case you aren't aware, my name is not Cherice. Only my Grandpa Art can call me Cherice because, well for some reason he genuinely thinks that's my name. When I was very little I tried to set him straight to no avail (setting him straight wouldn't do anyone good, just ask his "special friend" Warren"). The name of our street was also misspelled but I'm not about to put that info all over the interwebs.

The moral of this story: Don't put your faith in everything you see on Pinterest. Yes, it is chock full of inspiration but not everything works out the same way for everybody. Keep on loving and keep on pinning!

The dead of....Spring?

Do me a solid and check your calendar. Wait, who am I talking to here? Look at the little calendar icon on your smart phone. It should say January. I think all of the calendars must be misinformed because clearly, in Texas at least, it is not January. It is April at the earliest. When I woke up this morning the weather man informed me that Austin was thrilled to be enjoying 61 degrees. We would see a high in the low 80s. WTH??? I know, I know. It's Texas. One day you're in shorts, the next day in a winter coat. Or if you're one of the customers at the store where I work, it's often the case that is the same day and the same outfit.

Rim Shot!

After surviving 100 days of over 100 degree heat this past Summer, I could not wait for this Winter. I filled my Pinterest Recipe board full of chili, stews, and casseroles. Mmmm stewww. Mmmm Pinterest. With the weather being so damn nice outside, I can't bring myself to make these Winter-time treats. Hell, five minutes outside and I want dogs on the grill! We also have a pile of firewood stacked up from last year that I've been dying to use up. I love the way a fire makes our crappy duplex house feel like a home.

Of course I fully blame it on my fiance. This is what every good woman does. For the last three months we have been looking for the "perfect" pea coat for that mo-fo and wouldn't you know, we finally found one. A few weeks ago we happened to walk through JC Penny on the way to get his bi-annual hair cut and there it was. A charcoal grey double breasted beauty handed down from the outerwear gods. The best part? 70% off. Sweet. Baby. Jesus. Originally priced at $180 we took it home for $54. Huzzah! I would love to show you a picture of him sporting it, but ya know, it's 80 effing degrees outside. Not exactly coat weather.

In conclusion, you win snow birds. You win. Can someone book me a ticket to New England for this weekend? I hear they are expecting snow. Lucky!

Shocks...Pegs...Lucky!

The Cedar Fever Blues

Doesn't that sound like a bitchin' Stevie Ray Vaughan song? Side note: my biological father once told me that we were related to SRV. I would really really like to believe I share some of his wicked cool blood. I would also like to believe that I am royalty like my great grandmother once told me. She may or may not have been suffering from dementia at the time.

Cedar season this year is killin' me y'all. What do you get when you mix a stressed out bride-to-be with a never ending allergy attack?

Evil!



I did something really bad this week. I snapped at my dear sweet dad for wanting to wear western style cuff links. I wasn't nice. I wasn't even pleasant about the situation. I was a total little selfish snatch about it. Don't get me wrong, the cowboy cuff links won't be happening, but I could have handled the situation a lot better. I could have politely explained that we had already picked out the accessories the guys will be wearing and I'm sorry to disappoint. Bad bride.

I blame it on the mix of outrageous stress that comes at crunch time (52 days to go, holy bananas!) and these damn allergies. I feel like all of the life has been drained out of me...in the form of snot. I'm sexy and I know it. Mix endless sneezing/runny nose, a mild headache, slight fever, and eyes that I swear I'm about to itch right out of my head and voila! Cedar Fever. Here's a simple progression so you can thoroughly understand.

This is me in September 2011 (no cedar in sight), slightly dolled up.

Personal Image

This is me in February 2010, just getting over cedar season.

Personal Image

And this is me in the heart of Cedar Season.

I've come to terrorize y'all's neighborhoods...

I keeed I keeed...I wouldn't put my ugly allergy affected mug on the interwebs for everyone and their dog to see. What do I look like, some kind of no0b? Don't answer that.

So mostly, with this post I just want to apologize to everyone that I have offended this week with my general snatchiness. I'm not nice, I know. I'm going to work on it. There goes my New Year's resolution of trying to be "less bitchy." I also want to apologize to everyone that I've offended with my overall appearance. Good lord I'm a hot mess. There's not enough concealer in all of Sephora to tackle this face. 

Inspiration Rain Down On Me

Today I have been thinking about how incredibly far this wedding has come. Once upon a time all I needed was a fluffy dress and a guy at the end of the aisle. Preferably this dress and this guy:

                                       Jordan Knight



ZOMG that train!!

What can I say, I had pretty high hopes as a toddler. Then I grew up, fell in love, and became obsessed with wedding planning. For years I had stashed away plans for a black/white/red/damask theme. It was pretty cutting edge stuff in 2008. When we actually got engaged, I realized this was total crap (sorry to any black/white/red/damask brides out there). It just wasn't us and it wasn't fit for a March wedding. Thus came the vintage monster. I have a love/hate relationship with the bitch trendsetter that started vintage weddings. They are so pretty and I am so excited that we are having one. Everything about it screams us! We love love love old timey things. However, the weekly trips to the Antique mall trying to find decor that is in good shape and old enough to use has put a serious strain on this lady's pocket book. Thank the good lord for Goodwill and Ebay. Within our vintage theme our first try at colors were soft baby pink and mint green. These colors have evolved to clover green, pewter, lavender, and ivory. Why are defining colors even important? This is why:

Julia Roberts and her rendition of Shelby has had me picking out my damn "colors" for as long as I can remember.

I'm really excited to see all of the pieces that we have strewn throughout our house come together (riiight now, over me) in one cohesive manner. In my head everything works together but who knows until we unpack all of the boxes and start setting up tables.

Here is my inspiration board:

Mosaic Maker

 I shall be thoroughly overjoyed if everything turns out as pretty as this board.

2011 in Review Part Deux Revised

**Revision** I have decided to take down a lot of information. I don't want to be that person that hangs their dirty laundry to dry but there is no way to sugar coat the happenings of the past 6 months in my life. If you are close to me, you already know the meat and potatoes of it (let's all count the colloquiums of that last paragraph, damn!). The last 6 months of 2011 are pretty hard for me to write about. I had to really come to terms with a very toxic relationship in my life. On the other side of these events, I can say I feel so much stronger as a person due to these events. Sometimes it's the toughest times in our lives that bring us to our happiest points. Without further ado, I will finish my month by month year synopsis.

June cont'd.

In June I hit the big 2-5. Quarter of a century. Holy crap. I'm like a real grown-up now. I'm no longer "too young to be thinking about marriage" and most of my friends own at least one car seat. I also went to my first neurologist appointment to discuss the migraines I've been having for about 5 or 6 years. They were fantastic. They gave me several options and treatment patterns. The preventative medication I've been taking since has been working like a charm, although, the medicine they gave me for when a migraine does happen, doesn't work at all.  I also watched my BFF of 11 years get married this month. I felt truly honored to be such an intimate part of their day and it was with this wedding that I realized what was about to come. I also met our officiant at this wedding. Stan Stan the preacher man. He's pretty awesome. One of Mr. Catkin's closest cousins got married this month as well. It was a beautiful ceremony and a serious party. That was indeed a good good night. I had a feeling (hehehe).

July

The first week of July I drove up to my mother and grandmother's apartment in Irving to both celebrate my mother's 44th birthday and to pick out a wedding dress with some of the most important women in my life. I chose the David's Bridal location at Hulen in Fort Worth because of it's central location to my ladies. This day was hard y'all. Not only was I nervous almost to the point of tears about picking the wrong dress, not fitting in any of the samples, or not finding anything, I felt somewhat let down by the experience. Some of the women that I had invited to be there (because I really valued their opinion and really needed their support) didn't bother to show. This made me feel unimportant. I know it was just picking out dresses and not the actual wedding or anything, but I had good reason for asking them to be there. A good dose of humble pie is always good, but not when you are trying to remind yourself everyday that you are indeed worthy and special enough to be marrying someone who in your mind could do way better. BTW, I'm not throwing myself a pity party, I just think my man's one helluva catch and I still don't know how I pulled this one off. Anyway, with the (amazing) ladies that had indeed gathered around me for this day, we started trying on dresses. Once I said yes to the dress and the bridesmaids that were present picked out a dress we met up with my dad for an amazing lunch at Saltgrass Steakhouse. *In book club for the month of July we read Thyme of Death and I didn't finish it....because it sucked. My attitude toward life might have had something to do with it. This month going forward I was in a pretty bad place.

August

This month flew by in a mix of confused tears. In book club we were supposed to read "100 Years of Solitude." I read a few pages. It was eh. Not sure how it made it to Oprah's book club choices, or our own for that matter. Again, my attitude toward life might have had something to do with it. It was also eleventy-billion degrees in Texas that summer. You couldn't even think without wearing yourself out with the heat. I had an MRI for my migraines. It was the most terrifying experience of my life. I had a full blown panic attack and the tech laughed at me. The results came back saying my brain is "totally normal" ha!

September

Most of Texas caught on fire this month. It was truly Hell on Earth. I escaped to the brisk temperatures of Central Michigan for a long weekend. I had the best time catching up with my Grandpa and that side of my family. I think they knew just what severe funk I was in, even though I didn't recognize it myself as I was determined to be my spunky annoying self, and they really rallied around me. I feel so much closer to all of them and that's saying quite a bit. I asked my favorite uncle to be an usher in our wedding and I am so thrilled he said yes. His little girl is our flower girl and I'm so happy to have both of them with me on our day. This uncle has an amazing wife and this flower girl has an amazing mother. Seriously, I look at Lindsay and all I see is the woman I want to be. I'm pretty sure the sun actually shines out of her ass. She's funny and beautiful obviously, but she's so real. She actually parents her child into being a good person. She actually uses big words. She actually shows love in everything she does, even when she's frustrated. And she gets frustrated! She's not one of those fake Stepford wife happy-bots that pretend everything is ok. She is real and I love this woman. This amazing woman threw me a bridal shower during my brief stay that was more than I could have ever imagined. I'll have to share pictures later because they need serious photoshopping. Hint: I'm going to have to work on sitting like a lady for the shower I have coming up. The end of this trip solidified a serious decision I had to make. Someone who used to be very close to me will not be attending the wedding. I am both happy and sad about it. I am sad that I do not have a story book family life, but hey, who does? And I am happy that I am strong enough to know who matters and who really cares about us as a couple.  *In book club we read James Patterson's The Postcard Killers. It was a good read but lacking in depth.

October

Not much happened in October. I dealt with what was ahead of me. We were the first couple in Austin to register at the Container Store. We were in there so long that by the time we had emerged the seasons had changed...no lie. The rest of book club read Ender's Game. I did not. I started The Help. I bought a ton of candy for Halloween and didn't have even one trick-or-treater.

November

Thanksgiving. Nom nom nom! I finished The Help and freaking loved it. We also read A Dirty Job and it is hilarious! If you enjoy a read based on pure humor, run, don't walk to your nearest Half Priced Books and pick up this beauty. I had my first dress fitting and it fit! I am now known at the Abilene David's Bridal as the "Vera" bride because I'm the only one to come through their alterations department with a Vera Wang. #RockStarStatus

December

Christmas was met with lots of time spent with amazing family and friends. I couldn't have asked for anything better. It is through these people that I know the healing process is happening. I am a stronger person now. I will be okay. We partied it up on NYE at our home...by ourselves...like we do. I drank a bottle of wine and half a bottle of champagne. I was hilarious! Just ask me.

2011 in Review part one.

As 2012 is sure to bring a lot of changes, what with the wedding and moving back to Mr. Catkin's stomping grounds, I would like to review the whirlwind of a year that we just put behind us. 2011 was a roller coaster of a year.

January

We rang in our first new year as an engaged couple totally pissed off at each other. You see, here in Austin, late December-early January marks the beginning of Cedar season.

Cedar? The horror!!

Y'all, I am allergic to EVERYTHING. Seriously. I have two different types of allergy pills and an EpiPen in my purse at all times. I also have to get allergy shots twice a month just to keep my immune system in check. So when this effing awful time of year rolls around in the Hill Country, my body goes bazerk.  I become this sneezing, eye scratching zombie. Guess which day the cedars decided to grace us with their pollination in 2011? Yep, December 31st. I could not keep my shiz together. My newly minted fiance so badly wanted to go downtown for NYE. I can't blame the guy, this was our first time living in a real-honest-to-God-city. I did my best and trudged along for most of the day. We went to a pretty good Impressionist exhibit at the Blanton Museum of Art and had a great dinner at Spaghetti Warehouse. We went to Zilker Park for some family friendly fun (because 6th St. just isn't my bag baby) and after an hour or so of being outside I couldn't contain myself. I was covered in snot (sorry guys, this hotness is taken), and exhausted from power sneezing all day. What's a power sneeze you might ask? It's one of those sneezes that feels like an explosion, scaring the bajeezus out of your companions, and leaving your body riddled with fatigue. When cedar is in season, all of my sneezes are power sneezes. After me begging, and him bitching about how I never want to do anything fun and I ruin every good time he every tries to have (yay let's get married!) I ended up passed out on the couch with a fever. I remember waking up in a stupor to catch the epicness that was the NKTOB/BSB routine on Ryan Seacrest's Dick Clark's Rockin' NYE.

The rest of January was met with transitioning to a (much better) management team at work and really kicked off my wedding planning. The book we read in book club this month was the last 3 books of Harry Potter. Amazeballs of course!

February

Ah February, the shortest of the months, The month of Valentines. The month when I read (read=obsessed over) The Hunger Games. This is also the month that I decided to go to an upscale beauty school to get my hur did. It took 7 hours for highlights. That's not a typo and it was definitely not ok. As someone who is prone to migraines, I was PISSED. They were very sweet at this unnamed beauty school. They let me go without paying and were gracious when I explained that I had only brought enough cash to tip to the first person who worked on my hair. That's right, there was a shift change in my highlight process. Son. Of. A. Bitch. They did a fantastic job. So fantastic that Mr. Catkins had no effing clue that they had even done anything to me. Super. Back to The Hunger Games. Have you read this shit? It is amazing! I couldn't stop thinking about it. During said hell-hole hair appointment, all I kept thinking was how Katniss wouldn't put up with this and Cinna's team would have this crap knocked out in no time. 

Reeeead Me!

 

March

March was  a scary month for me. This was the month we could no longer look at looming wedding tasks and say, "eh, the wedding is over a year away, we'll worry about it later." No, this was happening. And it was happening in 12 months. Holy. Balls. This month I took on one of the biggest tasks and found our amazing photographer Lisa Hackbarth from Illuminate Photography. She is one of the sweetest and coolest people we have met in our short stay in the ATX. She agreed to take our engagement pictures on a Saturday. That's like un-freaking-heard of. Not to mention it was the first weekend of SXSW and we just had to have our e-pics taken on South Congress. To those of you not familiar with the area, that's akin to wanting portraits taken in Times Square on New Year's Eve. Well, maybe not that bad. But it is freakin' crowded down there. Austin during SXSW, or any event, or any Tuesday for that matter, is like Mecca for hipsters. 

 

I couldn't pick just one 

 

What's that? You want to see some of these engagement pics? Ok, I guess. Keep in mind this was almost a year ago and we hadn't really hit our stride at the gym yet. 

All images courtesy of Illuminate Photography

There's a lot more but my computer takes forever to upload them. If you want to take a peak that the whole set you can see them on our Wedding Web page. 

April - June

 

Not a lot happened these months. I read Water For Elephants and thought it was aight'. Our book club saw the movie and the best part was the mimosas at the Alamo Drafthouse Cinema...ya know, besides R.Patz. Will and Kate got married and I like every other nerd in America watched with bated breath. I DVR'd the hell out of it and even cried during their vows. F*ck I'm a sap. In June, I read Wicked and fell in love with Elphaba and the rest of the gang. Now I can't watch The Wizard of Oz without giving that bitch Dorothy the side eye.

In my next post I will share months July - December and how my whole world crumbled but became so much stronger.

Hey there, Hi there, Ho there!

Hey there blog readers! First let me clarify a few things, this is NOT a diet blog. Not no way, not no how. Simply a pun on my name...and subtle irony as to how much my lard ass hates to diet. The first two letters of my (asinine) first name are Ch and my (almost) husband's last name is Atkins...like the diet. The horrifying diet that consists of depriving your body of the glory that is carbs. Just me? Oh.

You might have noticed that I clarified that I am not quite married yet. T-56 days until I am officially a Mrs.

omgCat-330x330.png

I am scared shitless a little nervous about standing up in front of all of those people for 6 straight hours and not falling down, saying the wrong thing, or ya know, have a boob pop out. Murphy's Law was written about me. In case you aren't hip to Murphy's jive, he basically said "what can go wrong will go wrong." I go wrong all the damn time. You can see why I would be nervous about being a bride. Brides are supposed to be graceful and elegant. What has two thumbs and is always falling down? This guy! I just hurt myself pointing at myself with my thumbs.

So join me as I take you along for this ride called life. I'll show you a little bit of hell wedding planning, life as newlyweds, the occasional book review, baby fever, and a lil TMI thrown in for good measure.

See ya 'round!